Craig Bellamy to Spurs. Who's clapping?!? (Photo by Mark Thompson/Getty Images)
I'm not going to link to one of the 9,000 articles that say Tottenham are going to sign Craig Bellamy because each and every one of them makes me want to vomit. The club loses 5-1 and the answer is Bellamy? At least Scott Parker fills a need and is a quality player. Bellamy could fill a need if he were, you know, good. But he's not. He's past it and while he plays a position that the team could use help at, he doesn't play it in the way the team needs.
So what is Bellamy? He is two things and they are the two things most impeding Spurs' progress right now. He is one of Harry Redknapp's boys and he is Premier League tested. Like Younes Kaboul, Jermain Defoe and Peter Crouch, Harry likes to have players he's familiar with. Now possibly add in Scott Parker, Joe Cole and the useless Bellamy and there's more. Bellamy has also proven he can succeed in the Premier League. It may have been several years ago and when he was a completely different player, but he's Premier League proven!
Cover on the wing wouldn't be bad since it has been a while since either Gareth Bale or Aaron Lennon looked blinding so having someone to push them would be fantastic, but is Bellamy really going to push them? No. Finding someone, anyone, that can finish is a priority, but Bellamy isn't an upgrade over the guys we already have in the team. He doesn't bring pace or an aerial presence. He doesn't ft into the team. Thankfully he could be a Spur though.
Bellamy was good, but nothing incredible for Cardiff last year. You know, in the Championship. He battled injuries, which is the kind of player we could probably use because I don't think our physios are busy enough as is. He's also not particularly cheap, but it's not like wages are ever an issue for Spurs so we can ignore that. As you can see, there's a lot of good in this Bellamy move.
Buying Bellamy is just too Spurs-esque, or maybe more accurately Harry-esque, for it not to happen. He's from the Isles, he's one of Harry's guys and he's played in the Premier League before. It's also incredibly stupid. It all fits. Of any rumor, this one makes the most sense. Come on down Craig Bellamy.